Someone once said, “You will experience two types of pain in your life, the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.”
We both know that the pain of regret hurts much more than the pain of discipline. So, how do you create and maintain good habits? How do you eliminate negative habits that aren’t taking you where you want to go?
One thing I have done, as you probably have as well, was to make a decision to change everything in my life all at the same time. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired, and so I decided for massive change. We decide that we are going to improve our health, finances, relationships, job, and daily routine all at once. This often can be far too overwhelming. This type of massive change can lead to overwhelm and then failure. I believe this is where most people make a huge mistake. Don’t try to change everything all at once. Pick one or two things at the most to work on now and create a system that will help you create these new habits in your life.
The first thing is to identify the one priority habit you want to change and ask yourself why you want to change this one habit. When it is important enough for you to change, then the change is easier. I think the easiest way to eliminate an old habit is to create a new habit. The Reticular Activating Device in the brain… the synapse that is connected to the adjoining synapse… the path that we automatically take (habit) must be broken. We do this by creating a new habit… a new neurological pathway that is followed automatically.
Just like when you learned to drive… everything was awkward in the beginning and you had to mentally focus on each thing that needed to be done. But then with practice, you can probably drive, listen to the radio, be in a conversation on the mobile phone, take your correct turn off the freeway and drink a coffee at the same time as you scratch your head! The brain learns the neural pathway of driving and being observant of the traffic and the speedo all at the same time.
If you work on just 2 things every quarter of the year, you will have created 8 positive habits in just one year. NOT BAD!! This brings about permanent change.
Here is a suggestion for a new habit: Develop a unique focus on the current moment, and drawing from it all of the substance and wealth of experience and emotions that it has to offer. Create a Lifestyle habit to take the time to watch a sunset. Relax for that moment and take it in! Lifestyle can be listening to silence. Relax for that moment and take it in. It can be noticing the innocence of the baby. Relax for that moment and appreciate our creator! It is giving a smile to someone who has done. Relax for a moment and have empathy! Lifestyle is capturing each moment so that it becomes a new part of who we are and of who we are in the process of becoming. Lifestyle is not something we do; it is something we experience. Lifestyle is laughing at myself! And until we learn to be ”there – fully present in the moment”, we will never master the art of living well and finding happiness and contentment. Happiness knows that this day, this moment is the only one I have and I choose to live it – stop and smell the roses… have a coffee and savour the aroma of the coffee. Let go of resentment and bitterness and past failures and really live every moment in gratitude and appreciation, in joy and fullness.
Take it in, and the energy from the moment gives us the ability to get so much more done in a day, and we have enjoyed our day!
Action Step: Right now, go get a pen and a piece of paper.
- Write down only 2 positive habits that you want to create in the next 90 days.
- Write down what will be the benefits of creating these new habits.
- Focus on the benefits (not the discipline) required for the new habit to be formed.
Your Wealthcoach, Yvonne
